Most of the time

Most of the time, I'm laughing.

Most of the time, I'm strong.

Most of the time, I'm capable.

Most of the time, I'm sane.

Most of the time, I'm shiny and clever.

But sometimes...sometimes...I'm just me. The real me.

Sometimes I get sick of the show.

Sometimes the sadness takes over.

Sometimes I wish I was as shiny inside as I am outside.

Silly? Maybe. I'm not crying for help, or being dramatic...just honest.

Sometimes I need help.

I value control, probably more than I should. When I feel it slipping through my fingers, I panic.

I'm panicking.

But when you see me next, I won't be. I'll be clever and strong and shiny once again. Because it's just so much easier to pretend that everything's going to be okay than to face the reality that it might not be.

The show must go on, no?

1 people used their Big Boy words to communicate:

DL said...

thank you for your transparency...you basically said all that I am feeling these days!

Missed seeing you at the 4th of July - I even braught Lulu for you to meet her! Hope to catch up soon! xo