Reading material

I love the library.

I mean, I loooooooooove the library.

I love the stories, and the smell, and the visions I have of curling up on the sofa and spending some quality time with myself, sipping hot chocolate and cuddling with my Snuggie.

Except my "quality time" is spent with two kids yelling and two dogs shoving their noses up my crotch. And I don't own a Snuggie. And it's hot as shit right now.

Meh. Whatever.

The other day, I got a call that five of the ten books I have on hold were available. Yes, five. I'm aiming high.

This was the conversation between me and my friendly library employee:

M: Hello?

FLE: Mrs. Huttner?

M: Is my mother-in-law here?

FLE: What?

M: Never mind. Who's this?

FLE: This is the Orange Public Library. We're calling because the books you had on hold are available fo pickup.

M: Sweet! Which ones are they?

FLE: Let's see...Duma Key, Odd Hours, The Lovely Bones...ummm...Corpse and uh, Dead Men Do Tell Tales.

M: OK, I'll be by today to get them.

*pause*

M: Hello?

FLE: Ummm, Mrs. Huttner? That's an interesting choice of reading material.

M: I know, right? I'm going to have so much fun tonight!

*pause*

FLE: Uh, ok then. Have a good night.

*click*

The Orange Public Library thinks I'm a serial killer.

5 people used their Big Boy words to communicate:

Caitlin said...

Shan, you're great and I love you. So thankful you know the joys of the public library. Yeah for free books! Happy reading...Caitlin

jenni said...

shan, i have lovely bones. and i LOVE that the library is scared of you :) ha ha ha!

DL said...

I LOVE reading your blog! You always make me laugh! I agree with Jenni - hilarious that the library is scared of you!

I need to be better about going to the public library..thanks for the reminder!

Anonymous said...

hahahahhahhahahaha

Brown-Eyed Girl said...

That is too rich. My husband thinks that I am secretly depressed because I enjoy sad and disturbing books so much. LOVED lovely bones. Ever heard of 13 reasons why? Check it out, it's a winner.